Blink

I am in the middle of this really good book by Malcolm Gladwell. Basically it says that split second decisions can be as good as or even better than long thought out judgments. He uses simple language and interesting stories to bring his point across, which makes it really easy to read.

Anyway, an example of this split second analysis, also known as thin splicing, was shown in studying marriages. By just watching a 3 minute footage of a couple in conversation, one guy was able to predict fairly accurately whether they would split up in the next 15 years.

There are many markers for a poor relationship, but as is the case for other decision making, having too much information clouds and confuses the mind. One thing to look out for is contempt, which generally means GG. This is also true in professional relationships, where it was used to predict which doctors would get sued.

Of course, i guess its true for any relationship. Platonic, romantic or professional. If someone speaks with contempt, he is speaking down to you and basically taking you as a dimwit. Even if he is really capable and has achieved much, this lack of humility just takes the gloss out of his shine. If you can, stay far away from such people.