Lost (2)

my uni life is almost over and i only have one paper to go before i graduate. i should be happy but i never felt more lost.... because of events in the past week i have never felt more insecure about my abilities and what i want

for design, i failed to pin point the short comings to the content when i was collating.. things i should not have missed

for sustain, i failed to work with my teammate proper.. she was too opinionated for me to handle and i think the essay was like 75% her work.. even for presentation i know i will do poorer than her.. i still cannot conclude but i guess she is better than me.. in both written and speaking ability.. (where did my toastmasters skills go ?) more imptly, i always thought i was decent at writing but i missed her pov.. and she failed to see mine.. still i think if i werent so rushed we would have done a better job so while she may be better, she is wrong for leaving it so late and not communicating with me her idea for how everything should go. instead she just threw it all at me and expected me to suck it in, without giving a thought for whether i felt it was right or not. i guess she just thinks i am a fool

and when everything came together, i just couldnt handle it all and i have to say the quality of my work went down. i certainly hope that is the case and if it werent so packed i would not have missed the things that i did

work wise.. i still dont have a job.. and see above, what ability do i have? i probably wouldnt be able to handle the report job?? wheres my stress tolerance really? am i so chui? so useless? all i want to something i am good at and can give work life balance, is that too much to ask? why cant i find anything... is the bald man right? i wont be able to find work at all ?

lost..

still it is good i only have one paper so i can really concentrate on my job search now..