oh life

met up with a few project mates some time back.  one is now a successful full-time tutor, enriching the lives of over 30 kids and another ensures his patients receive proper after-care, managing to persuade one stubborn gentleman to clean up his place - something his town council and many other social workers had failed to do so.  yet another is now meeting with european counterparts in high level meetings, having pulled away from a more technical job after deciding that it wasnt his cup of tea.  in short, they are pursuing their dreams and living the lives they seek.

this inevitably led to some self-assessment.  i still dont know what is my dream, having already changed direction a few times but yet still staying along the same path.  (it is odd but also heartening that i can still draw parallels across these different worlds).  havent made some earth-shattering announcement nor have i managed to please any angry appellants.  although i have moved, my old flaws have followed along with me. all in all, it all seems quite directionless and rudderless.

just yesterday, a colleague remarked that he was thinking about the major decisions in his life and asked me about mine.  i confessed that unfortunately, i havent really thought much before taking these steps, such as what i should study or how i should best make use of my time.  at the same time, serendipity has allowed me to find my anchor in life and it warms my heart to know that even if i dont manage to win accolades in the workplace, there is always someone to turn to, always there for me.  i guess some times just wu da wu zhuang is also a strategy in itself.