The Booth

"Hullo, would you like to take a personality test?" She almost spat the words out, seconds earlier having done a facepalm after being the last of her colleagues to find an imaginary someone to talk to upon seeing me.

"What if i fail, i dont have much of a personality" i began to ask.

She pretended not to hear and passed me a pamphlet. "It'll only take 5 minutes" She said.

Minutes later, i was done. Another reluctant co-worker had been tasked to handle me. "Okay, lets see your results" She said with fake enthusiasm. "Wow, your three highest scores are pretty close" She remarked. "Some people just have one. Or maybe two", which meant "Okay, your not only weird, but also probably schizophrenic as well"

"See here" She said, pointing to a table. "This one means you are a doer. And this, means you are a thinker"

"Isnt that contradicting?" I asked. She seemed offended, like someone had taped over her episode of Days of Our Lives. "No... its compatible! You have to think before you do, eh? Eh?"

I couldnt think of a polite reply, so i let her go on. She started to read out a list of characteristics corresponding to each category, pointing at the relevant words as she did so. Then the words "avoids interaction with others" appeared and i laughed.

"Pretty accurate eh?" She went on to the next list, and "asocial" come out. "Well," she said. "At least your studying the right thing", going onto a list of related career choices.

"Does that mean i shouldnt be a teacher?" I asked.

"Well........ teacher goes under here" She answered, showing a different category. "Outgoing, feels rewarded by helping others, etc" She went on, just stopping short of saying: just everything you're not; selfish bastard.